It seems all I ever do at the moment is cry. I can be having the best day ever but when it comes down to it all I cry. Sometimes i just wish I could curl up and die because nothing ever seems to go right for me. This weekend started amazing, got terrible, got better and now is the worst it could have ever been.
I honestly just wish I could come right out and tell my parents everything! Everything that's going on right now, and everything I've found out. However, I know that if I do it'll just make things harder and worse. When people say it makes life easier when its all out, I know they're lying. Life can be so much better but the only way for that to happen is to keep everything away from your parents ears. If they knew the things I've done, who I really am behind the innocence... They'd send me away, disown me, hate me.
My life is just too confusing to handle, I've been crying too long now and the room is spinning and my head hurts and my eyes are throbbing. Its not good. I just need someone to hold me, and tell me its alright. Even though its not... Even though only a few people know everything. I still feel sick even thinking about telling my family the whole story. Im scared of what they'll say, what they'll do...
Life isn't fair.
Sophie Eleonore. xx
Sophie - believe it or not, your parents love you. Yes, they might get upset - but they will NEVER stop loving you. That being said, you do need to find somebody you can talk to. Maybe a school councelor? Somebody at your church? At the very least, call one of those Teen Counceling phone numbers... but most of all, find an adult to talk to! 1-800-852-8336
ReplyDeleteand continue to write about it in your blog - as much as you feel comfortable with.
Remember: you are SPECIAL and the world would be a lot worse off without you in it.
Thank You so much!
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